Tuesday, December 26, 2023

sub sects in marriage



My two cents on too much dependance on strictly following sub-sects, sects etc in marraiges, with special reference to my species, the Iyers or south Indian brahmins. With change of some words and phrases these ideas could apply in a universal canvas too....
The degree of conservatism varies.. conservatism can be based on Inertia or tendency to just carry on with the pattern existing for years.
Conservatism can be based on expediency.. the sects somehow termed superior over the ages would love to maintain that soap bubble because the Vadama or whatever superior tag, though assumed would give them some advantage or sort of compensation for inadequacies on other counts..
Even when the general pattern is universally accepted, some sects who are generally seen as lower down in the scale, make a lot of noises and try to bring in authorities and endorsement to have them declared as superior..
All these tendencies work in a very subtle manner these days, quite against the noisy scenes created by middle aged females and paattees or old thathas..
But most of the Iyers are conservative even when they are covered by tweed coats or denim skirt, and brag of some residence in some part of USA or England or Australia or even Namibia..
And Iyers will not like what I say below, and I am not a social revolutionary, but where exactly is the law that brahmins should marry brahmins alone?
If you are opposing conservatism sincerely, how can you maintain the stand that there should be marriage within the caste alone.? Alternately if there can be a stand that region, subsect, language etc should be considered, that alone cannot be called as conservatism
..
Personally, I would prefer to have and if necessary modify my own rules for marriage within my own circle of relatives and influence, and would attempt to follow a family pattern, (because ultimately only the close family counts.. and the messiahs in the Facebook would not be seen anywhere when the chips are down) and would never try to criticize or even air views in social media.. It is absolutely meaningless to called certain acts alone as conservatism

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