hunger, the best appetizer

संपन्नतरमेवान्नं दरिद्रा भुंजते सदा । 

क्षुत् स्वादुतां जनयति सा चाढ्येषु सुदुर्लभा ॥

– महाभारत, उद्योग अ.३४ 

saṃpannataramevānnaṃ daridrā bhuṃjate sadā । 

kṣut svādutāṃ janayati sā cāḍhyeṣu sudurlabhā ॥ 

– mahābhārata, udyoga a.34 

The poor people, the people who have to struggle hard to find ways and mens to find a mouthful of food to eat, actually eat very nice food which would satisfy them in all ways.. Hunger adds the real taste to food.. Such satisfaction and contentment cannot be found in the rich and affluent persons 

This is from Vidura neeti of Mahabharatham 

സംപന്നതരമേവാന്നം ദരിദ്രാ ഭുംജതേ സദാ । 

ക്ഷുത് സ്വാദുതാം ജനയതി സാ ചാഢ്യേഷു സുദുര്‍ല്ലഭാ ॥ 

– മഹാഭാരതം, ഉദ്യോഗപര്‍വ്വം അ.൩൪ 

ദാരിദ്ര്യം അനുഭവിക്കുന്നവന്‍, 

അടുത്ത നേരത്തേക്ക് വയറുനിറയ്ക്കാനുള്ള ആഹാരത്തിനു വേണ്ടി നെട്ടോട്ടം ഓടുന്നവന്‍, കിട്ടുന്ന ആഹാരം എന്തായാലും അത് വിഭവസമൃദ്ധമായ സദ്യപോലെ രസിച്ചു കഴിക്കുന്നു. 

വിശപ്പ്‌ എന്തിനും പ്രത്യേക സ്വാദ് നല്‍കുന്നു.

ഈ അനുഭവം പണക്കാരില്‍ കാണാറില്ല.. (അവര്‍ എന്തിലും കുറ്റവും കുറവും കാണും. പരാതി പറയുവാന്‍ അവര്‍ക്ക് ധാരാളം സമയമുണ്ട് )

മഹാഭാരതത്തിലെ വിദുരനീതിയില്‍ നിന്ന്

on aparakriyas...

Some thoughts on the death rites  performed  in the Hindu Vedic way..

The cremation is expected to be performed within one or two hours of death, if death occurs during daytime.. But the cremation is done best before sunset.. Of course there are instances where cremation is conducted during night too after prayaschittam..
If the death occurs during night, the cremation is to be conducted within two hours ideally after sunrise..

When the pyre burns down
Preferably next day of cremation, Sanchayanam or collection of bones of the deceased is conducted.. The pyre is doused with milk, the ashes and bones are arranged to form the shape of a body.. The bones are picked up by the son with a violet brinjal and a rope used for tying cattle, tied to his hand.. The collected borns are kept in a earthen pot.. The bones can be left in a flowing river immediately.. If it is desired that the bones should be left in holy rivers like Bharatapuzha, Ganga etc,, the pot with bones can be kept safe somewhere in the funeral ground itself..

The ashes should not be taken home.



During cremation rites, a piece of cloth covering the dead body would be torn from it and retained.. This piece of cloth is to be kept with the son for giving Vasodakam for the ten days following..

Once the Sanchayanam is over, the rites for the pretam.. pretam is the status gained by the dead person immediately on its death.. The pretam would be blind and bodyless on the first day.. It would be very desperate and would be feeling very hot and thirsty because its body is burnt..
In the ten ensuing days, the pretam assumes an astral body growing limbs one by one and the astral body is in full shape on the tenth day of death..

When the rites start.. and it can be started on the second day of death.. or if it is not plausible, at least on the ninth day.. The start of the rites is by invoking the pretam in two pieces of granite.. and placing them in two pits.. one pit at home and one pit at the banks of a nearby pond or river

Every day, the son is expected to offer balls of rice called pindam, and water through the part of the cloth which covered the dead body and kept apart and also water and tilam (ellu).. This rice and water are offered on the two pits at home and the riverside.. the water so offered is called Vasodakam. The water mixed with ellu is called tilodakam  Pindam is offered at the house kundam.. and ghee, honey and curd too are offered..  tender coconut water is also offered optionally.

On the tenth day, the pretam is assuming its full body, and senses.. It will have great hunger and thirst. And it would be yearning for food and other materials it enjoyed during its lifetime.. So a sumptuous or Prabhoota Bali is offered to the pretam on that day.. During the period prior to midday.. All food materials can be offered on a piece of cloth laid before the pit at home.. and the son and all other relatives offer such food and offer pranams..
On the tenth day all Sapindas, Dayathis etc too offer Vasodhakam.. or water from the cloth to the dead person

on the eleventh day the preta is sent to the house of Yama and joined with him. To enable its safe journey, a calf bull is also supposed to keep company with the pretam.. For this purpose, a calf is hired, offered respects and freed.. This is called Vrishotsarjanam.. There is a sacred homam too offered to Lord Rudra chanting Srirudram.  And a fire offering to Preta and Yama is also conducted..
Then one Brahmin, on whom the pretam and Yama are invoked is fed, given clothes, and given Dakshina.. A lot of pindams are to be offered to the Brahmins.. Since the Brahmin is not capable of receiving such a heavy offer, the pretam invoked on the Brahmin is transferred to fire.. Agnau Karyam.. and then the pindams are offered to the fire..
That single Brahmin, on whom preta and yama are invoked, is asked to leave.. when he leaves, the persons who do the Karma and all others persons close their eyes and that pretam is not to be seen by anyone when he is going out… ( Usually Savandi Kottans are employed for this.. And this is the reason or one of the reasons why there is a belief that a single Brahmins should not be met.. while starting on a good missions)
The eleventh day Sraddham and rites to fire is called Ekoddhishtam

On the twelth day the son is expected to do the Sapindeekaranam.. In fact, as per shastras of old, the preta has to be offered Sixteen Shraddhams including the monthly shraddam Six month Sradham before sapindeekaranam.. If that procedure is followed it would be possible to do sapindeekaranam only during the first annual ceremony..
But then if the son or the person who did the last rite did not survive, there could be no sapindeekaranam.. and hence it has been decided that all the sixteen Sraddhams would be offered on the twelth day itself and then Sapindeekarana Kriya also would be done on that day.

As I mentioned above, from the day of death the dead persons has only the status of Pretam… and pretam has a lot of limitations and is all alone and helpless.. To join the ancestors as a group of pitrus, the pretam should be released from that status and should be joined with the ancestors as pitrus..

In fact till the death of the person, his father, grandfather and great grandfather, his mother, paternal grandmother and paternal great grandmother were being worship. But the death has caused one void… If the dead person is a male, then he joins his father and grandfather and his great grandfather.. or Vriddha pitamaha.. is released.. If the dead person is a female, she joins her mother in law, her mother in law.. and the senior mother in law of the great mother in law is released..
On the sapindeekaranam day, three Brahmins are fed.. Rice balls representing the dead pretam and its earlier three ancestors are prepared, and the son closing his eyes just mixes up the rice and joins the pindams, and prepares three pindams of his father/mother as the case may, his paternal grandfather/ grandmother and his paternal great grandfather/great grandmother… releasing the seniormost pitru in the line..

During Sapindeekaranam, a lot of Dhaanams are given.. for the happiness of the departed parent.

And on the thirteenth day, just to have a temporary reprieve from the trauma, and with a view to get released from pollution and to join the mainstream, some shubha karyam.. Navagraha Homam is done at home.. The relatives all visit temples.. Asheervathams are sought and given..



This is simply an outline.. There are many intricate rites.. which only a priest or group of priests can conduct..

on pithru karyams

Neither dharmasastras or any decent norms of living would
prescribe that one should not look after his parents when they are alive.. 

It is
inappropriate to combine two non-connected issues namely caring for elders while they are alive and performing the last rites when they depart..

 The duties to be performed
in the service of parents during their lifetime are also enumerated in our
dharmasastras and such dictates  are part of any decent legislation and social norm  wherever civilized human beings exist.
But giving a decent burial and respect to the deceased is another issue of equally prime importance..

One thing has to be mentioned here .. We incur sins for both neglecting
parents when they are alive or after they are dead.. 

The belief is that Pithrus
do not have the same spirit of forgiveness as the living parents. A living
mother may forgive me even if I kick her... 

So, if we are to believe in the
traditions non-performance of rites to the departed souls can be more
dangerous..
I have no disagreement on the point that one should look after his near and dear
and especially the parents, very well, even making sacrifices at personal
levels.. and this has to be done even without the reinforcement of Sastras.. 

I
do not think our fathers and mothers nurtured and nourished us and also loved
us because it is prescribed  in the sastras..

 And, to look after the comforts of my mother,
I need not be reminded by any sastra.

 But the ceremonies after death are more
of social relevance and vary according to social and cultural norms.

 I mentioned
the Indian tradition here .
link  http://kanfusion.blogspot.in/2012/06/perfromance-of-rites-to-departed-kin.html
I do agree a son cannot be called grateful just because he performed the last
rites if he has not cared enough for the parents during their lifetime.. 

But
if, and only if, we believe in the traditions and sastras, non-performance of
rites after death is an act of ungratefulness and this inference is clearly
emerging from the basic social norms.. 

We are supposed to be born into this
world with pithru rina (debt to living and departed elders), deva rina etc and
it is our duty to pay back such debts through the prescribed rituals and
rightful life ..
 

A quote from Kalidasa's Abhijnana Sakunthalam, which is not exactly religious
text may be relevant here..
It underlines the importance of propitiating the pithrus and maintenance of the
race
अस्मात् परं बत यता
श्रुतिसम्भृतानि
को नः कुले निवपनानि
करिष्यतीति
नूनं प्रसूति विकलेन मया
प्रसिक्तं
धौताश्रुशेषमुदकं पितरः
पिबन्ति॥
asmāt paraṁ bata yatā śrutisambhṛtāni
ko naḥ kule nivapanāni kariṣyatīti
nūnaṁ prasūti vikalena mayā prasiktaṁ
dhautāśruśeṣamudakaṁ pitaraḥ pibanti||
it is in the sixth Act.. Dushyanta has neglected Shakuntala due to a
misunderstanding..and He has realized his folly and is depressed. He is also
aware that Shakuntala was pregnant when he abandoned her and he had lost the
only possible progeny and he had no other children.. He is also worried about
the lack of progenies after him to perform the last rites of his departed
elders.. He is exclaiming
"My pithrus are now drinking waters offered by me to them only to the extent of
what would remain after washing off their tears because they are always sad and
are shedding tears worrying that after this Dushyanta who is childless, there
is no one in their clan to perform and offer to them, as ordained in Shrutis,
the means of their survival in the pithru loka.."
So it was always a social responsibility to cherish one's own elders departed or
living..

Perfromance of rites to departed kin

Who Should Perform Cremation and death rites for a deceased person  according to Dharmasastras, as quoted in the Smriti Mukthaphalam   Sraddhakaandam   authored by Vaidyanatha Deekshita.

क्रमेण प्रेतकार्यकर्तॄनाह मरीचिः

पुत्रः पौत्रश्च तज्जश्च पुत्रिकापुत्र एव च पत्नी भ्राता च तज्जश्च पिता माता स्नुषा तथा॥भगिनी भागिनेयश्च सपिण्डो धनहार्यपि। पूर्वपूर्वविनाशे स्युरुत्तरोत्तरपिण्डदाः।  ईति

पराशरोऽपि –

पुत्रः पौत्रः प्रपौत्रो वा तद्वद्वा भ्रातृसन्ततिः इति।

कालदर्शोऽपि –

दाहादिमंत्रवत् पित्रोर्विदध्यादौरसः सुतः। तदभावे तु पौत्रश्च प्रपौत्रः पुत्रिकासुतः॥ इति।

क्षेत्रजो दत्तकः क्रीतः कृत्रिमो दत्त एव वा। अपविद्धश्च पत्नी  च गूढजः कन्यकासुतः।

पौनर्भवः सहोढोन्यो नंदनश्च सुतीकृतः। दौहित्रो धनहारी च भ्राता तत्पुत्र एव वा।

 पिता माता स्नुषा चैव स्वसा तत्पुत्र एव च। सपिण्डः सोदको मातुः सपिण्डश्च सहोदरः।

स्त्री च शिष्यः ऋत्त्विगाचार्या जामाता च सखापि वा उत्सन्नबन्धो रिक्थेन कारयेदवनीपतिः।

krameṇa pretakāryakartṝnāha marīciḥ

putraḥ pautraśca tajjaśca putrikāputra eva ca patnī bhrātā ca tajjaśca pitā mātā snuṣā tathā||bhaginī bhāgineyaśca sapiṇḍo dhanahāryapi| pūrvapūrvavināśe syuruttarottarapiṇḍadāḥ|  īti

parāśaro'pi --putraḥ pautraḥ prapautro vā tadvadvā bhrātṛsantatiḥ iti|

kāladarśo'pi --dāhādimaṁtravat pitrorvidadhyādaurasaḥ sutaḥ| tadabhāve tu pautraśca prapautraḥ putrikāsutaḥ|| iti|

kṣetrajo dattakaḥ krītaḥ kṛtrimo datta eva vā| apaviddhaśca patnī  ca gūḍhajaḥ kanyakāsutaḥ|

paunarbhavaḥ sahoḍhonyo naṁdanaśca sutīkṛtaḥ| dauhitro dhanahārī ca bhrātā tatputra eva vā|

 pitā mātā snuṣā caiva svasā tatputra eva ca| sapiṇḍaḥ sodako mātuḥ sapiṇḍśc sahodaraḥ|

strī ca śiṣyaḥ ṛttvigācāryā jāmātā ca sakhāpi vā utsannbandho rikthena kārayedavanīpatiḥ|

Mareechi has mentioned the order of duty of performing the death rites.

1.Son.  2.Son’s Son  3. Son’s Son’s Son.  4..The Son of a daughter who by an earlier verbal contract and provision of funds has been assigned this duty. 4. Wife 5. Brother. 6.Brother’s Son(s)  (7) Father  (8) Mother (9) Daughter in law. (10) Sister (11) Sister’s Son (12) Sapinda  (paternal relatives of three generation) (13) One who is inheriting the wealth of the deceased by testament or otherwise.   Among the foregoing categories, the persons mentioned ealier in the list  have the duty and on their absence/death alone the next persons take over.

Parasara has simply mentioned..

the duty is for the  Son, Son’s Son, Son’s Son’s Son or of equal status like the brother’s son etc.

The Lawgiver Kaaladharsa has  given very detailed hierarchy.

(1) the uterine Son   ( 2) Son’s Son  (3) Son’s Son’s Son  (4) Putrika the daughters son who is contracted for this purpose. (5) Son born in the womb of the deceased’s wife as Kshetraja (6) Adopted son  (7) a child who is purchased for a price. (8) Who has come as a dependent orphan and has been treated as a son (9) own son who has been given in adoption  (10) recognized as son though illegitimate  (11) Wife  (12) Son Who is born secretly (13) Son who was born when the wife was a virgin (14) Son born on a widow on remarriage (15) A boy living with him  (16) a boy who has been treated as son out of affection (17) Daughters son (18) The person who inherits the wealth. (19) Brother (20) Brothers Son (21) Father 

(22) Mother (23) Daughter in law (24) Sister (25) Sisters Son (26) Sapinda (three generation patrilinear male relative) (27) Sodaka ( seven generation patrilinear relative) (28) Sapinda on mother’s side (29) Mother’s Brother  (30) Maid servant (31) Disciple (32) The deceased preceptor the ritwig (33)  The deceased preceptor  aacharya (34)  Sisters husband (35) Friend  and  (36) for whom there are no relatives or the persons mentioned in the above categories, the ruler of the country has to arrange for creamation and aparakriya.